INTÉGRALE, LONGUEUR, AIRE

Banks

The Flying Piggy Bank

After many of Creation’s earliest Demiurges complained about how difficult it was to make bold development strides without going severely into debt, the Powers That Be began giving Demiurges access to various lending institutions.
In Heaven, all loans are repayable over 100 years, with modest interest rates.  Since everyone’s nice in Heaven they’ll take IOUs in lieu of loan payments, but a novice Demiurge still runs the risk of going into insurmountable debt by taking out too many loans.

The Flying Piggy Banks are authorized to hand out loans of up to one million Pennies From Heaven.

Eternal Trust Savings and Loan

After many of Creation’s earliest Demiurges complained about how difficult it was to make bold development strides without going severely into debt, the Powers That Be began giving Demiurges access to various lending institutions.
In Heaven, all loans are repayable over 100 years, with modest interest rates.  Since everyone’s nice in Heaven they’ll take IOUs in lieu of loan payments, but a novice Demiurge still runs the risk of going into insurmountable debt by taking out too many loans.
Each branch of the Eternal Trust Savings and Loan is authorized to loan up to ten million Pennies From Heaven to needy Demiurges.The First Warthog Banks of Hell

First Warthog Bank of Hell

After many of Creation’s earliest Demiurges complained about how difficult it was to make bold development strides without going severely into debt, the Powers That Be began giving Demiurges access to various lending institutions.
In Hell, all loans are repayable over 100 years, with zero percent interest rates.  If, however, a Demiurge defaults on a loan in Hell, the lending institution is empowered to confiscate a predetermined number of SOULs from the Demiurge’s Gates, garnishing his wages for a number of years.
The First Warthog Banks of Hell are authorized to hand out loans of up to one million Pennies From Heaven.

BH and D, Savings and Loan

After many of Creation’s earliest Demiurges complained about how difficult it was to make bold development strides without going severely into debt, the Powers That Be began giving Demiurges access to various lending institutions.
In Hell, all loans are repayable over 100 years, with zero percent interest rates.  If, however, a Demiurge defaults on a loan in Hell, the lending institution is empowered to confiscate a predetermined number of SOULs from the Demiurge’s Gates, garnishing his wages for a number of years.
Each branch of the Brimstone, Hellfire, and Damnation Savings and Loan is authorized to hand out loans of up to ten million Pennies From Heaven.

Limbo Bars

The Limbo Bar ‘n’ Grill

Very few things can keep a Lost SOUL from drifting off to another Afterlife.  One of those things is a good stiff drink (not necessarily alcoholic, but stiff nonetheless).  The Limbo Bars take advantage of this little-known fact by luring nearly-Lost SOULs into their cozy, friendly confines, where they’re entertained, fed, and basically kept distracted for months at a time.  Eventually, the SOUL stumbles out of the bar, and with luck, the Demiurge has built what the SOUL was looking for in the interim.
The Limbo Bar ‘n’ Grill is a solid investment for the Demiurge who’s concerned about the havoc that unforseen disasters can wreak upon their fragile Afterlifes.  They can entertain 15,000 SOULs a year, and have enough supplies to show for about 600,000 customers in total.

Limbo Inn

Very few things can keep a Lost SOUL from drifting off to another Afterlife.  One of those things is a good stiff drink (not necessarily alcoholic, but stiff nonetheless).  The Limbo Bars take advantage of this little-known fact by luring nearly-Lost SOULs into their cozy, friendly confines, where they’re entertained, fed, and basically kept distracted for months at a time.  Eventually, the SOUL stumbles out of the bar, and with luck, the Demiurge has built what the SOUL was looking for in the interim.

“Lament of the Lost SOUL”
(sung to the tune of one of the Afterlife’s favorite sitcoms)

“Finding your way
in the Afterlife
Takes lots of savoir faire
Sometimes incompetent
Demiurges
Forget that you are there

Don’t you just hate to drift away?

Sometimes you’d rather go
Where Angels feed you
while you wait
For someone else
to build your Fate
You don’t wanna
be a Lost SOUL,
Driftin’ towards another Gate,
You wanna be where
Angels feed you
while you wait.”

Umm, well.  The Limbo Inn has enough supplies to temporarily entertain up to 14 million nearly-Lost SOULs, and enough seating capacity to house 300,000 of them a year.

Siphons

Ad Infinitum Siphons

The Afterlife would quickly lose its appeal without a little touch of the Infinite to keep SOULs constantly happy/sad.  Without the Infinite, severed limbs wouldn’t grow back, that 403rd helping of apple pie wouldn’t taste as good as the first, and SOULs would soon grow bored with even the most pleasurable/painful of fates.  Fortunately for you, the very fabric of the Afterlife is interwoven with thin strands of the Infinite, which are more than capable of “charging” the multiple paradoxes found in the typical Afterlife.

At least, up to a point.  Ya see, the ambient Infinitum level in most afterlifes just isn’t high enough to soup up your Rewards and Punishments much past the halfway point.  If you want to run a really snazzy Afterlife, you’ll have to find some more Infinitum.

Enter the Ad Infinitum Siphon.

See those rocks, scattered hither and yon about the Afterlife?  Those rocks are infinitely heavy, man.  They’re teeming with Infinitum, just waiting to be sucked up by an Ad Infinitum Siphon like this.